Conclusion

It was a very anxious morning, wondering what Dr. Blake's second opinion would be. After another exam and reviewing all of my records, this doctor DOES concur with Dr. Brown. In fact, he said there's not a doctor in this country that wouldn't recommend surgery. I suppose what he said gave us the reassurance that this IS what needs to be done, but I must admit for a few minutes I thought maybe it wouldn't have to happen.

Now though, after talking with him, he was not as optimistic as Dr. Brown, so we have a bigger fear of what COULD happen if the surgery isn't totally successful. Because the tumor was so low, and they will need to take at least another centimeter of tissue around where it had been, it is dangerously close to a muscle that if damaged would change my life as I know it. This is our greatest fear now. So, I have a new Prayer to ask – for a completely successful surgery on November 10th. If the result of earlier prayers are any indication, I have no doubt God will answer it. Please, keep the prayers coming....

Second Opinion

Although we have the utmost confidence in our surgeon, whose recommendation is radical reconstructive surgery, we felt we owe it to ourselves to get a second opinion, not because we doubt him but more to assure that this is the right way to go. If he agrees, then it's all systems go on November 10th. If he does not, then I'll be very confused and will have a hard decision to make. The appointment is tomorrow (Tuesday).

You may wonder "If the tumor is gone, why surgery?" Good question. Because there may be microscopic cancer cells left behind that are not detectable by any other tests except when sent to pathology during surgery. If the whole area isn't removed, these cells may grow back years later. A chance I wouldn't want to take. Stay tuned.

And to Doug...

YOU did it!!!! If ever there was an example of how a spouse should act as a caregiver (except for the recent ankle injury) you wrote the book mister! You're my hero during all this. And to our friends and family... God listened and acted upon all your prayers. My support system has been amazing, like nothing I EVER could have imagined. If I didn't reply to your emails or Blog comments I apologize, but know that I love getting them and was lifted up emotionally, and obviously physically. My fullest gratitude to you all. It WORKED!!! - Debbie

"I can't find it"

Family and Friends, those are the four sweetest words I have ever heard. Those are the words Dr. Brown our surgeon said to me today during our appointment trying to find the tumor. The only thing left is an ulcer where the tumor once was.

Words do not describe the emotions we are feeling right now other than Euphoric. I know this moment is short but we are savoring it, as we still have a long road ahead. But as I said to our dear friend Sharon M. the road just got paved.

A huge thanks to our team...ALL OF YOU and our team captain...God!!! Your prayers, many acts of kindness, thoughts, emails, etc. have inspired us and calmed us along this journey and made it possible for Debbie to focus on healing. YOU DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I want to especially thank Dr. Acker and his group at Skyridge Radiation...Angel, Gwen, Alli, Carol, & Tracy. And Dr. Basche with the chemo treatments. YOU DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also a very special thanks to Greg...you rock with the acupuncture and Chinese herbs. All the rest of the gang at Integrative Medical in Castle Rock, Dave, Tam, David, we are so grateful for your healing hands!!! YOU DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Of course, love and thank you to our immediate family, your love and support of your Mother/Daughter/Sister is monumental. YOU DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Whew...Lots of emotion today. We still have surgery ahead of us and chemo after, but the road for a successful surgery has gotten alot brighter. Debbie's surgery is looking like Nov. 10th with probably about a week in the hospital.

Most of all, Debbie, my beautiful wife...You have been through 2 months of agony, but guess what YOU DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Much to do yet, but you will hit the homerun.

Longevity

This weekend was a real test of longevity. Saturday afternoon we drove to UNC (about 1-1/2 hours away) to see Andrea as Princess Alexandra in the play "Elephant Man." Other than a little stomach pain at dinner I was feeling quite good and then made it through the (amazing!) 2-hour play, but by 10:30pm I was ready to call it a night at the hotel while a group went out afterwards. Doug in his ankle cast hobbled around quite well. Sunday there was nothing wrong with my appetite as we went to brunch. We said our goodbye's at the dorm and headed back. More stomach issues just as we got back into Castle Rock, but then a great nap during the second quarter of the Packer game on TV did wonders. All in all. a quite successful outing.

This next week will be quite busy getting the last of my newsletters for '08 further along. Tori's off school for Fall break. The big day is Wednesday when we meet with the surgeon who will determine how successful the previous treatments have been, and let us know when the surgery should take place.

And another one goes down

Wednesday as Doug went out for his early morning run with our golden retriever, Logan, he stepped off the curb and buckled his left ankle in a pothole. He went down like a rock. Luckily a neighbor was nearby and helped him get back to our house (thanks Michelle!), where I answered the door in my robe and she said, "your husband's in my back seat, he twisted his ankle, we heard a big POP, and he has to get to the hospital." Aaahhh, you've got to be kidding! At 7am none of the urgent care places were open so she brought him back home, I put ice on it and waited until after 8am when another neighbor (thanks, Al!) took him. Long story short, now Doug will be doing "baby steps" in a walking cast for about 3 weeks, needs to elevate and ice it often, but is getting around pretty well and even driving. He says "nothing's going to keep me from taking care of you."

Coffee Talk

We met Meena for coffee. She's the lady who a year ago went through exactly what I'm about to, and she had offered to Dr. Basche that if she knew of any one who may benefit from her experience, she'd be happy to talk to them. Well that offer came the same day as one of my appointments with Dr. Basche, so I couldn't ignore the coincidence. Meena is my same age, has kids about our kids' age, works in Castle Rock, eats very healthy, doesn't smoke, and too was totally surprised by her diagnosis. We compared our chemo and radiation experiences, and she explained what I could expect with upcoming surgery, dealing with the temporary illiostomy bag, dietary restrictions, and the follow-up chemo (which may need to be the drip where they put a port in my chest and I go in every other week for 4 months). Meena's an amazing lady, who today is doing very well, and I thank her for being so candid, caring and giving of her time to meet with me.

A lot of things will be determined after our next appointment with Dr. Brown, the surgeon, which is next Wednesday, Oct. 22. That exam will tell if and how much the tumor has shrunk, and when the surgery will be. As I'm being told, baby steps, take every thing a day at a time. Right now my pain, which is mainly in my stomach, is being managed by Tylenol with Codeine 3 times a day, and an afternoon nap.

Better!

Earlier this week was pretty rough, but with each day that has gone by since I am feeling better. I was thrilled that I got up this morning and fixed us French Toast for breakfast, so obviously my strength AND appetite are better. It's mid-morning now and am starting to drag, so as not to push it I'd better cuddle back into bed on this chilly autumn day.

Boosts

There must be a few more days ahead of me before the getting-better part starts. Whew, what they boosted in me must be working its way out bit by bit. What I'm expelling is toxic, and leaves me exhausted and in pain. My appetite has been very little, usually soup and toast, so I make sure to drink Ensure and the sports drinks with electrolytes to replenish. I have not lost my hair, but I have lost 14 pounds, so I'm down to what my driver's license says. Diet and exercise would've been the best way to lose those, but oh well.

Last radiation / New prayer

We have completed the last of the Radiation treatments! Woo hoo! Thank you to the radiation oncology team at Sky Ridge Medical Center for greeting us with a smile everyday, and making this part of the journey less frightening. And to Dr. Acker, "let's hope that bat hit this skunk on the first swing!"

The last 3 days have been what they call "boosts" which are more intense and zeroed-in on the area (which WAS the tumor). This boost will continue to do its job for about 10 more days, and I should start feeling better day by day. In 3 weeks I get rechecked. If I may request a NEW Prayer, "For the tumor to be gone and that the impending surgery (in November) won't need to be as radical or invasive (reconstruction) as originally thought." There's nothing medical yet telling me otherwise, but that is my new hope.

And to Doug.... Happy 51st Birthday today! You rock.

Anniversary / Kids' surprise

Today's our 25th wedding anniversary. Any trip or dinner out has been temporarily postponed. But what I did do this afternoon was a great treat for myself... I had back-to-back appointments at Integrative Medical for acupuncture, chiropractic, massage (the best, most healing I've ever had), and kineseology, which was a chance to open up and express what I'm going through. After my radiation appointment at 11:00, all I had wanted to do was reschedule and crawl back into bed. I did not, I made it there, and am so glad I did. I practically floated back to the car. Although still tired, my mind, body and spirit has a newness about it.

Now, the girls evidently have something special planned for us tonight because yesterday we got a homemade invitation delivered all the way from UNC saying Doug and I are cordially invited to a Soire, and to meet in my office at 5pm. This should be creative if I know Tori and Andi. And Doug has a special dinner at home planned. How fun to anticipate...

SURPRISE: We arrived at my home office door promptly at 5pm to a desk full of silver confetti, and Hersey Kisses lined across the top of my monitor, with Andrea on screen (webcam). Tori pressed Play and a video presentation began showing pictures of Doug and I as children, then in the '70s when we met (seriously, was there no hair or fashion police back then?!); then pictures of our wedding day, all set to music with words written by Andrea, and technical work by Tori. It was wonderful, thanks girls.